Let’s Talk About Sex

I proposed this question: “Do Sex Positions Matter?” to my private Facebook group called Fertility Help and if you would like to get involved in this private conversation please join us, by clicking here.

Do Sex Positions Matter When Trying For A Baby?


Sex positions matter when you are trying for a baby naturally and if you are doing assisted fertility

Here’s why:

In the Daoist training I have done (and taught) since 2004 I have come to understand that sexual energy is extremely potent and powerful. We are sexual beings. We procreate through sexual intercourse and it is not just the act that counts but the energy put in (and created from the experience) that counts too.

I have been utilising my energy medicine practices to help women and couples have babies when nothing else has worked for them and have seen first hand the remarkable transformation when they manage their energy.

For a start, wherever your mind goes energy flows. So, choosing a sex position you enjoy that keeps your mind focused on the ultra-pleasurable task at hand can be the most mind-blowing, earth-shattering, out-of-world experience that releases a rush of feel good hormones (like oxytocin, serotonin and endorphins) that put all the cells of your body into a heightened state of joy. Such a state activates your cells and your body’s systems to vibrate at its optimum level of frequency and vitality which helps your whole body function better.

A better functioning body is the best foundation for making a baby.

Daoist Sex Practices (Bedroom Arts) – AKA Joining of Essences

Daoism has been around for thousands and thousands of years and from it stems Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM), Tai Chi, Qi Gong, etc. Daoists have utilised the art of love-making to help keep dis-ease, illness and even premature death at bay. I believe they have mastered the art of perfect health, harmony and longevity.

I don’t believe everything that is published about Daoist sex practices and baby-making but I do believe the flow of energy makes a difference to your body being able to get pregnant and hold a pregnancy (naturally or through assisted means such as IUI or IVF).

Sex Positions Matter for Natural Fertility

The two most studied sex positions by Western Scientists are the Missionary Position  (with man lying on top of you) and Doggy Style (when you are on all fours, and being entered from behind).

No matter what position you choose you want it to be:

  • enjoyable
  • involve deep penetration

You may find that having your legs on his shoulders in Missionary Position allows for deeper penetration. You want to minimise the distance the sperm need to travel.

Did you know that the shape of the female pelvis matters because the shape determines which is the optimal position for the sperm to unite with your egg. If your pelvis is tilted out of alignment it could hinder the sperm being able to reach your egg. (You can have a physiotherapist or chiropractor or osteotherapist look at your pelvic alignment and tell you the best sex position for you whilst trying to conceive).


Choose Your Sex Position to Suit Your Mood When Trying to Conceive

If you are tired (or have morning breath) you may prefer to lie side by side in a spooning position but depending on the shape of your pelvis, if this is not a position of deep penetration you may then want to switch to something else that is.


What Sex Positions to Do When Energy is Low While Trying to Conceive

If you are feeling a bit down, even gloomy and notice you have low energy (not really in the mood for making love) then Doggy Style has been known to help recharge your mood by stimulating your liver meridian.

If you are feeling exhausted (you have low kidney qi) and you feel your body’s batteries are running on empty then Reverse Cowgirl is said to rejuvenate you – but then switch positions before he ejaculates otherwise his swimmers will be fighting gravity.


Orgasms Matter for Natural Fertility and Assisted Fertility (IVF)

Although there is no scientific evidence to prove that you need to orgasm to conceive I’m sure you know of people who did not orgasm and still conceived. That being said orgasms can benefit your body in these 7 ways:

  1. Improves oxygenated blood flow and nutrients to your reproductive system and helps regulate your menstrual cycle.
  2. Increases fertility and improves wellbeing by “energising your hypothalamus gland” (according to a Science Daily article entitled: Sexual activity causes immune system changes that increase chances of conception).
    • Your hypothalamus regulates your mood, emotional state, appetite, body temperature and the pituitary gland which is the master gland in charge of reproductive hormones responsible for ovulation and cervical mucus.
  3. Helps stabilise oestrogen levels which contribute toward healthy vaginal tissue.
  4. Helps de-stress your body by literally flushing out cortisol (the inflammatory hormone released by the adrenal glands).
  5. Increases your DHEA levels which is essential for increasing your chances of pregnancy
  6. Stimulates your lymphatic system which helps you to detoxify and boost your mood.
  7. When you orgasm your body creates a sucking sensation and I have come to believe that when combined with visualisation it can help ‘magnetise’ your egg so it helps draw the sperm to reach its target.

Why Orgasms Matter When Doing IUI or IVF

If you orgasm (through sex of self-stimulation) before and after your procedures you are preparing your body by de-stressing, releasing feel good hormones, raising your body’s vibration to an optimum state of health and harmony and letting your mind and body know you are making a baby!

Orgasms For Manifestation

If you can manage your orgasms so you both orgasm at the same it is well documented that this can help you manifest your goal. So if you both visualise:

  • the joy of the sperm uniting with the egg;
  • and the joy of you being pregnant then having a beautiful baby;

then it can help to increase your chances of it actually happening.

Q&A Section –

Sex and Orgasms During Your Two Week Wait

Unless you have specific conditions that your clinic or doctor have classified your pregnancy as one of ‘high risk’ then it is perfectly safe and natural to continue making love and orgasming during your two week wait – BUT ONLY IF YOU FEEL COMFORTABLE DOING SO. If you don’t trust that this feels right for your body then do not do it.

No body knows your body better than you.

Penis Size and Shape – Does it Matter When Trying to Conceive

Ideally you want to help the sperm reach the cervix as easily as possible so the closer the head of the penis to either end of the cervix the greater your chance of creating your embryo naturally.


What Are The Best After-Sex Positions?

I recommend my clients enjoy these QiYoga: For Fertility postures after sex to help the sperm. Please be careful not to turn your neck doing these postures (Neck Bridge ‘Setu-Bandhasana’ and Plough Pose ‘Halasana’.)


References –

Feel Happy Trying to Conceive

Know You’re on the Right Path to Fertility Success

If you want to begin to feel happy on your fertility journey whilst trying to conceive and if you want to know you are on the right path to have your baby then I can help. Book a private consultation with me today.


About the author:

Fiona Boulton is a world-renowned Fertility Healer. (An expert in her field since 2007) specialising in:

Fertility Mind Mastery, Fertility Meditation, Fertility Yoga, Fertility Qi Gong and Fertility Coaching –

helping you take back control of your fertility, faster.

Through Fiona’s “transformation guaranteed” Fertile Lifestyle courses, Fiona helps navigate major transitions to detox your mind and body to help you effectively ‘think yourself fertile’; to change the map your mind has of your body and therefore change your physiology by clearing mental and emotional blockages to having your baby. Fiona’s work focuses on you taking back control by changing the internal and external environment of your cells so you can improve chances of fertility success.


Fiona, founder of Awakening Fertility is based:


Online and available to speak to you from anywhere in the world


Harley Street (Harley Street Fertility Clinic)

Concept Fertility Clinic Putney

Samsara Mind & Body SW18


United Kingdom, Chichester


Western Australia, Perth

Book your fertility consultation from the comfort of your home or experience face-to-face (in person) transformative session with Awakening Fertility founder Fiona Boulton, here.

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